Sometimes
by soniitk
Summary: Sanji is sitting next to a stone. Tells his feelings to the one on the other end.


_The characters on this story rightfully belongs to Oda._

* * *

_The world is too big._

_Yet life is too short._

_Too fearful for some._

_Happiness is never truly found._

_And if it exist, is hard to find._

_Yet, I discovered._

_There are wonders with full of mysteries of its own._

_The "All blue". One of them._

_The one I try to find._

_Though that one can wait to be uncovered._

_Does heaven exist?. Hell?_

_ I wonder to myself.  
_

_Though those would have to wait too._

_._

_Little is what we see._

_Yet too much to see._

.

_You know?_

_I'm not good at telling lies, just like being honest._

_I used to disguise my feelings with a smoking cigarette._

_It was how it was supposed to go.._

_I was deceiving myself, just like with those around me._

_Sometimes I didn't even know my true self._

_Well at least that was until I met you._

_You pull out my true feelings from inside,_

_My many emotions that were piling up._

_Were finally revealed to the world._

_._

_You made me angry._

_You made me smile._

_You made shout._

_You made me silence._

_And without my knowledge or approve._

_You made me fall for you._

_Though, I'm not angry about it._

_Actually I'm quite happy that I did._

_._

_People call us monsters._

_Though I am not denying it._

_Because I am._

_Though you were a better monster that I ever was_

_._

_It took me awhile to accepted. _

_Didn't I?_

_._

_We were both monsters._

_That was our only thing in common_

_._

_I can't even remember the last thing I told you._

_Maybe because I was angry that time._

_I wasn't thinking properly._

_I guess I let some stupid jerks confuse me._

_But I should have known the true._

_I should have known you were not like that._

_Now I can't help but cry._

_Cry like I never did before. Harder than the time I left Baratie._

_No cigarette can help me this time._

_When your dream is gone.. There's no point living after that.._

_._

_Reality must be a lie._

_And the dream must be the true._

_To forget the past just like when you rub out with your eraser a paper with scrabbles_

_I wish it was that simple._

_But this is reality. Nothing is simple like that._

_._

_This world is full of trash._

_And I was lucky to find you._

_Between all of this junk._

_You were a sparkling green emerald._

_._

_Life is harsh._

_I want to give up._

_But I cannot._

_I want to scream, but the words won't come out._

_I try to smile._

_But there's only a shiver and a silent murmur._

_The only sound that can be heard is a crying wailed in despair._

_Oh, wait. That's mine._

_"Will it always be like this now?"_

_._

_I couldn't say I was sorry. Say i love you._

_It's too late for that now._

_I came to my senses too late._

_._

_Life hasn't change._

_Days come just like they go. And just like that, months pass. _

_The world is still rotating._

_I don't feel any movement._

_No more._

_._

_The birds keep on singing._

_The flowers keep on blooming._

_The sun is still rising._

_And in night the moon will take its place._

_Life doesn't care._

_If you live or not._

_That's why I hate this stupid world._

_._

___My life and world changed since then._

_My voice refuses to sing again._

_There's light in front of me,_

_But I can only see the darkness._

_My world has stop running._

_And my life has stopped playing._

_How long have past?_

_I do not know. _

_Nor I do care._

_._

_Time, _

_Hunger, _

_Fighting,_

_ Cooking.._

_All have lost its meaning to me._

_._

_Sometimes I want to be with you._

_But I cannot._

_You are too far away from my touch and hold._

_Sometimes,_

_I wish I could live dreaming and never wake up._

_Because only in my dreams I can still see you._

_I can still feel you._

_Touch you._

_Hear you._

_And kiss you._

_._

_But that happiness disappears when I'm awake._

_Reality is too much for me to handle._

_Sometimes,_

_I wish I could go back in time and change our story._

_But that's only a foolish wish; nothing less, nothing more._

_._

_._

_What is faith?_

_What is destiny?_

_I cannot stop thinking how the world itself is unfair._

_We never did say goodbye.._

_I wonder if you can see me right now?._

_Can you see me?_

_Can you hear me?_

_If you do._

_Don't think I blame you._

_I blame this shitty world._

_I blame this crappy destiny._

_._

_Why they should decide our lives for us?_

_When it is only us._

_The ones who have the right to decide._

_Whether we take a bad turn or a good turn in our path._

_It's a decision we made._

_Not theirs._

_._

_Don't worry._

_I will still hold my head high._

_I won't stop living._

_Though, I wouldn't call it living._

_I'm just like a half- empty-bottle._

_Half full._

_Half complete._

_._

_I know I shouldn't cry over on what is gone._

_But how can I not?_

_When you gave my live to be worth something._

_When I thought it was completely meaningless._

_How can I?_

_When you are the reason I'm still living._

_How can I?_

_When the pain just doesn't go away._

_Only the other way around._

_How can I?_

_When you gave my life some entertainment._

_When I love you so._

_._

_I can still hear the echoes_

_Of your heavenly laugh._

_And my so called nicknames._

_Or see your death glaring eyes._

_And the electricity coming out of them, when we would start a fight._

_._

_Don't be mad._

_That I still cry when I think of you._

_Which is every day and every hour._

_I'm strong, but not that strong enough to handle this_

_shitty world on my own._

_But I will still carry on._

_Because you gave me a purpose in life._

_And I will accomplish it._

_And when I do._

_I'll be by your side again._

_Can you wait for me a little bit longer?_

_Can you watch over me until then?_

_Can you continue come to my dreams?_

_._

_Closing my eyes for a moment._

_I can clearly hear you answer._

_And feel your touch._

_I don't care if it's stupid or if I'm just imagining._

_But I will return your embracement just like the sunny days behind._

_._

_It may be a coincidence how we met._

_Not destiny._

_Nor fate or luck._

_But it was your piercing eyes._

_That made our paths collide._

_I used to hate you, I still do._

_But I love you too._

_._

_Only my weakness is to blame_

_Because of me, you are now gone._

_I let my rage take control of my body._

_Instead of my heart take command._

_But still, you protected my back, when I was angry at you._

_Even when I did not say a word to you._

_Or even a glance._

_You kept the promise that I could not._

_You even risk your life protecting our wishes._

_When all I did was pushing the blame in you._

_When it was mine._

_._

_If only I left my pride aside._

_And speak what I truly felt._

_Even if embarrassment was on the same line._

_._

_What is pride?_

_When you lose the most important thing?_

_What is your dream when you don't have that someone to be there with you?_

_._

_When I discover your body lying on the floor._

_And heard the reasons of your battle._

_Time stopped._

_I've stop hearing the battle cries._

_Or the crying sounds around me._

_Why it wasn't me?_

_ I question myself._

_._

_You are gone now._

_But thrust me, _

_my feelings for you will not fade or disappear._

_They will only grow stronger._

_._

_Now all I can do is say sorry to a stone._

_Which have your name on it._

_I wonder if you can forgive me for being so stupid._

_._

_Why did you fight when your swords weren't at your reach anymore?_

_Why didn't you refuse to give up?_

_Why did you have to be so stubborn until the end?_

_Or so I find myself thinking. _

_._

_We were always like the sun and the moon._

_We couldn't mix together._

_But when we did._

_An eclipse we would made._

_._

_Slice and kick._

_Throw and Punch_

_Jaws that bite_

_._

_In the mornings we were_

_Two bombs clashing together._

_Insults and swear words._

_Kicks and slashes_

_Tables flipping and bumps on our heads at the end._

_._

_And when the night came._

_We would become animals._

_You the lion_

_And I the tiger._

_._

_Kisses and bite-marks._

_Inescapable touches._

_._

_A swords master_

_And a kitchen lover._

_Who knew how much chemistry we could have together?_

_._

_Whose kisses were sharper than his swords._

_Yet mime like a sharp knife._

_They were so bitter._

_Yet, they gave an unstoppable desire._

_._

_Whose eyes were spirals._

_And a marimo head._

_They were so weird but unique on their own._

_._

_We were a wonderful team._

_An unstoppable one._

_We were rivals_

_With a brotherly trust_

_Yet, with a husband-and-wife love._

_Fighting whether at the surface or in bed._

_But now all those, are only memories._

_._

_Nobody knew of our story together._

_Or maybe they did but they never spoke._

_I will not speak of them, but I will remember them._

_I will not love again like I did with you._

_I don't know if I'll be able to laugh again._

_But I only know one thing_

_That nothing will be same with you gone._

_._

_Sometimes is like I'm half asleep._

_Because I can still hear you saying to me._

_"Shitty cook"._

* * *

First I'm sorry for the grammar. If you have read my other stories then you should already know English is not my first language.

Second this story was supposed meant to be post last week so sorry for that too.

Now on the making of this story. At first it was going to be a UsoppxSanji. But something around on the making I changed my mind.

So this is why he starts thinking of himself worthless..like he cannot go without him. The original line was "You know I'm not that strong enough to handle this world on my own" or something like that.

The reason why it's so long. It's because i mixed this story with others poems which are quite old. (Some were in Spanish and others in English)

The others poems were actually meant to be a girl-boy story, about destiny, opposites, ...

And I had to redo and redo this poem. Because some sentences were repeated again and again and still do..but i think its fine... And I wasn't satisfied in some parts, taking out Usopp lines, new ideas came to mind...

So truly sorry about that too.

Now cutting to the chase. Zoro dies in this story. And the only thing it came to mind for that to happen, was that the men he was fighting with. Had taken his swords. How? I do not know...

Anyway i hope you guys have like it.

Arigato for reading!


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